Having been outclassed by the Ladies in all areas of training, commitment, boat speed, technique and fitness, a group of LBC’s Masters men cunningly decided to instigate a competition in which they could get their own back and definitely beat the women. Yes, it was Movember once again, so Jonathan, Allen and Paul led the way in a fund-raising competition to grow the most exotic moustaches that mankind had ever seen.

In spite of the protests of their long suffering partners, the three Moustacheketeers persevered for the entire 30 days not just to put as much prickly hair on their top lips as they could, but more importantly to raise a significant sum of money for their chosen men’s health charity ‘Movember’, with the final total reaching a staggering amount well in excess of £1,000. Donations are still open at www.justgiving.com/team/LBC-GROWERS so why not boost that total even further if you have not already done so?

Allen took inspiration from ‘Blackadder Goes Forth’ to cultivate the look of a WWI Subaltern. His job as a 2nd Lieutenant forcing his men to go over the top would have been achieved with aplomb, based on his experience of chivvying reculcitrant LBC oarsmen into complying with any instructions from the Committee. It is surprising that Allen’s skill at working from home and passing orders over Zoom was not also adopted by Edmund Blackadder.

Jonathan took a different approach, by apparently showing that he could grow a full set very quickly, until he was reminded that beards did not count and should be shaved off immediately. He later confessed that he had mistakenly uploaded the photo from his KGB identity card. This error was quickly corrected as he reprised his role in the Hollywood gutbuster ‘The Good, the Bad, and the Handsome’ in which he claims he had starred as the last of those three characters. It is perhaps fortunate that, due to lockdown, the Three Amigos were not able to ride into Loughborough Town although there are rumours of swing doors being fitted to the LBC bar so that Jonathan can make an appropriate entrance once restrictions are lifted.

Paul took a more considered approach to hair growth, no doubt fearful that Emily would eventually decide that enough was enough and get her revenge by pulling out each hair individually with blunt pliars. However, he achieved a magnificent growth that brought out the inner Brucey in him – even if no one was saying ‘to see you…nice’. But what a ‘good game’ he played!

Congratulations to all three participants for being such good sports and raising such a significant sum of money. Even if on 01 December Paul decided that ‘the growth is going. Not to return. Ever.’ and Allen summed up the lessons learned by noting that ‘if Jonathan ever says ‘I have an idea’, consider saying no next time.’

Until next Movember….